Re-posted from Impressions (Originally posted on June 10, 2014)
A woman of worth is the crown of her husband,
but a disgraceful one is like rot in his bones.
– Proverbs 12:4
The presence of near and dear ones, reception parties – large or small, and honeymoons, etc., most certainly enhance the pleasures of the occasion and the joy of a wedding.
But what is the ultimate goal of a marriage from a man’s viewpoint?
Universally, all men wish for a perfect wife. But what does one mean by a “perfect wife”? What are the qualities needed to be an ideal spouse? Many women do not know about it though most of the qualities of a perfect wife are already built into them and develops as she grows up.
In India, Neeti Saara or Neeti Sastra is a popular collection of morals written by Baddena, a 13th century Telugu poet, believed to be a Chola prince named Bhadra Bhupalan.
Baddena sums the six noble virtues an ideal wife should have in a verse as:
‘కార్యేషు దాసి, కరణేషు మంత్రి, భోజ్యేషు మాతా, రూపేచ లక్ష్మీ, శయనేషు రంభ, క్షమయా ధరిత్రీ… and so on.
“Karyeshu Dasi, Karaneshu Manthri, Bhojeshu Mata, Shayaneshu Rambha, Roopeshu lakshmi, Kshamayeshu Dharitri, Shat dharmayukta, Kuladharma Pathni‘
1. Karyeshu Dasi: Work like a maidservant.
Should serve her husband like a maidservant.
2. Karaneshu Mantri: Advice like a minister.
Counsel her husband like a minister to deal with various problems that confront him.
3. Bhojeshu Mata: Feed like a mother.
Cook his food and feed him like a mother.
4. Shayaneshu Ramba: Please in bed likeRambha.
Satisfy her husband in bed like the heavenly courtesan Rambha, unrivalled in the art of seduction and making love.
5. Roopeshu Lakshmi: Beautiful like Goddess Lakshmi.
Maintain her beauty like Goddess Lakshmi (and show it to him only and not to other males).
6. Kshmayeshu Dharitri: Be patient like Earth.
Endure all stress and pain and be patient like Mother Earth.
Shat dharma yuktah Kula dharma Patni: A woman who has these six virtues is a good housewife.
This is a tall order! I do not think any woman in the 21st century would qualify as a perfect wife by meeting these six criteria.
In this age of sex equality, the women argue that these verses written by a man are chauvinistic. What will happen if a woman expects the following six qualities in a man?
1. Bhogeshu Raja: Be rich like a king.
2. Vachaneshu Rama: Honest like Lord Rama.
3. Chaturasya Krishna: Intellectually smart like Lord Krishna.
4. Dhairyeshu Karna: Courageous like Karna.
5. Roopecha Indra: Handsome like Lord Indra.
6. Kaameshu Madana: Romantic like Madana Kamarajan.
Shatdharmayuktha manadharma Ramana: A man who has these six virtues is the dear husband.
If you are a man, do you think you can qualify as a perfect husband possessing these six qualities?
- 6 Noble Virtues of an Ideal Wife – Qualities of a Good Housewife(anamikas.hubpages.com)
- Are you a Good Wife (Please treat this belongs to 1850 to 1950)(asbabu.com)